Archives for the month of: July, 2015

Perpetual laundry…

Nursing every 3 hours…

I don’t even remember what our kitchen counter looks like…

And a house so full of love and delight that I can’t even explain it.

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One of my biggest ah-ha moments as a mom was when I realized- for myself- that love grows exponentially.

‘Love’ seems to be one of those buzz words lately. ‘If we just LOVE each other…’ or ‘Love is the answer’. But to be honest with you I thought this was all kind of cheesy. Now if you read my blog then you’ve probably realized I teach yoga and practice buddhist meditation- so I understand all about love and compassion. But I have felt like there was an inauthenticity in the way some people used this expression ‘LOVE’.

I remember when I was towards the end of my first pregnancy, I was driving on the highway, jamming to ‘Black and Gold’ by Sam Sparro. I got really teary thinking that I wasn’t sure how I was going to love this baby because what I did was love my husband. Thats who I was, I was his wife and we loved each other, how was I going to have enough love for them both. Now I know what you’re thinking: this seems like I felt love was a scarce commodity- but it was how I felt. A few weeks go by and the nurse hands me my firstborn- and in that moment I understood how love works.

There are, in my recent experience, no limitations and no boundaries on love. Yet we all define it and experience it differently. My becoming a mother allowed my love to become bound-less. I have been able to love more people more freely, more compassionately because my kiddos have shown me how to love- MY WAY. Love grows and multiplies at astonishing rates. The trick is that we have to be open to the timing and the possibilities. It won’t do us any good to adopt another persons version of love. I would even say that doing this can lead us down a very unfulfilled and potentially self-destructive road.

So stay your course, look for YOUR love in all the unexpected places. Let it make you hurt and let it make you cry. Question it and doubt it.  And on the other side, if you’re lucky, you’ll be able to say that you LOVED in your own way as hard as you could… and the dishes will eventually get clean. The good news is that dishes don’t matter so much when you are full of LOVE.

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Imagine the most awkward day that you have had in your body…

You may have been motivated to start a new workout regime, or had a complete meltdown in the middle of the grocery store. Either way, that moment was defining. It motivated you in some way to either make the change you needed to, or it forced you to accept yourself exactly where you are.

Now, imagine that moment and take away your ability to do anything about it AND add raging hormones… You have yourself a pregnant woman.

The myriad of changes that your body goes through when you are pregnant are mostly beneath the surface. Early on you put on weight, feel sick all day, prefer sleep to any normal activity. You wait for the coveted ‘bump’ to arrive, and when it finally does you continue to put on weight, hopefully don’t feel as tired, but might cry at the drop of a hat.

While there is something extraordinarily impressive about a pregnant body (many things actually) it seems as though society isn’t really sure how to respond or treat a pregnant woman out in public. From a woman who has been pregnant twice and taught yoga to tons of pregnant students, here are some tips about what to say and how to behave around preggers in public.

1. Don’t forget that we are still women. Women are sensitive about our bodies even when we are not pregnant. I think its best to not even make a remark about her body.

2. If you ARE going to comment about her shape, size, or weight all you need to say is ‘you look great!’ Be authentic about it.

3. We love your excitement- but don’t be more excited than us. A simple ‘Congratulations!’ is all it takes.

4. Ask before you touch- if I wasn’t pregnant, you wouldn’t touch my belly. Well- its still my belly even though I am pregnant. Got it?

5. Your guesses about any of the details of my pregnancy are moot. Don’t guess if its a boy or girl, don’t guess how far along I am. If you want to know, ask… I MIGHT tell you.

6. Pregnancies are as different as the people who have them, so don’t assume that mine is like yours.

7. At any given moment we are doing our best to hold it together and not have a hormonal breakdown in regards to the changes our body- and our life- are taking on, so please don’t feel my pregnancy is an invitation for you to tell me how hard your pregnancy or L&D experience was. I have my own problems- swelling is a b%#&*